Ain’t that cute…

Entry Filed under: Uncategorized

August 22nd, 2009

At about 4AM this morning, while I was crafting some junk to feed my ugly face in the kitchen, I thought I heard a kid crying outside… There was a weird owl chick nest near my parking lot that usually gave off such sounds, so I ignored the whole thing. 10 seconds later, there it was again! I rushed outside to listen to what the hell was going on out there and I realized my brain hasn’t turned to a pile of fish food yet – a sound of a ~4yr old kid whining and crying about his mom was truly echoing throughout the whole neighborhood that was fast asleep! Well, imagine that – a stranded kid in a not-so-safe neighborhood at 4AM (makes you wanna ignore the whole thing… right?)… Just as I was about to rush out to find him (I knew the police would like to help me as much as I would like to shove 4 potatoes up my ass at this very moment), the sound abruptly stopped. Complete silence overshadowed my ambition of going outside in slippers like a complete idiot, yet I continued spreading my ears while trying to hear something again for the next 15 minutes, even though the munchies were kicking in in a much more aggressive manner. Not even after 15 minutes of complete silence did another sound grab my attention.

So, what have I learned from all this? Either some dickhead with air conditioning turned off decided it was a good idea to open all of his windows nice and wide so I could go on a guilt trip whenever I hear a “helpless” kid crying –OR- some other dickhead decided it was cool to take his kid on a walk at 4AM in the middle of the dark… somehow I think the former situation is much more plausible, yet it still doesn’t make it right – curb your kids, close your windows and for fuck sake, learn to quiet your kid down in a few minutes or less if possible, after all, the sound of a child crying is genetically implemented in our brain as a signal of urgency, and we wouldn’t want to combine that with the acoustics of a urban neighborhood where a pin drop is heard in the middle of the night… would we now?

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